This is especially true when it comes to love. I deserve a nice guy, a guy who will put me first, have a job, and let me wear the pants in the relationship while giving off the illusion of an equal partnership. Is that too much to ask?
Well for this broke college student, it is!
So lets dabble into my terrible date that has officially topped the list of my terrible first dates! And that's a pretty hard feat.
*Its important to note that I rarely do dinner dates do to the fact that my stomach digests food in like 20 minutes and I have to use the ladies room right after I eat!*
*Also, we were laughing through the whole date. We found our misfortune quite hilarious*
At work a couple years ago, this guy comes in with his cousin, and of course I'm flirting and being inappropriate, cause that's what you have to do at work, have fun! Anyways, we go on a couple of dates and they are nice. But we eventually stop talking. Flash forward two years (to a couple weeks ago), me and this guy, lets call him Severus Snape, are still friends and talk occasionally. Well, due to the fact that we are still single, and Snape is reaching his later 20's, we decided to go out on a date again. Dinner and a movie. What could go wrong? LAWD I shouldn't have asked that!
So Severus Snape comes to my house and picks me up at 7. And being smart, he didn't get lost! which is the #1 reason why I do not order delivery food, everyone gets lost. So we went to Chili's, since neither of us had been there in a couple of years, and that's where our troubles began.
*Let it be known that I wanted IHOP, I like pancakes and its closer to the theater*
We get to Chili's, there's a 20 minute wait, no big deal, we had time to spare since out movie didn't start till 9:45. We were fine with that and proceeded to sit in the waiting area. A couple of awkward conversations followed, little eye contact due to the fact that we were sitting shoulder to shoulder. After about 20ish minutes, teeny bopper hostess gives us a booth toward the back of the restaurant. Perfect, a quiet corner with few people, plenty of time for me to fuck up.
After a few long minutes, our server came, I don't remember her name since we only saw her maybe twice...tops...But we order our drinks, we both got coke (and I needed a DRINK, tequila anyone?!) after we got our drinks and got into a paper ball war our server came and took our order. I got a tex mex bowl of some sort, and Snape got CHICKEN enchiladas. 20-30 minutes go by, with us playing paper football, since I'm a toddler, and our food finally comes out. Mine was fine, Snapes however, was cold. Being a nice boy (and knowing I'm a server) he didn't complain to the waitress and started eating. 3 minutes later the waitress runs out of the kitchen and comes to our table, saying that he got the wrong plate and she had his correct order in her hand. He said okay and they swapped plates. He picked off the sour cream (which he asked for them to not put on there) and started to eat. He got a funny look on his face, so I asked him what was wrong, and he says, "Didn't I order the chicken?", to which I replied, "yeah". Turns out our server gave him some BBQ enchiladas instead of chicken enchiladas! And at this point we were all out of our drinks and our waitress was no where in sight. It wasn't until after I was finished that she decided to come over to ask if we want our drinks refilled. YES PLEASE! (MY MOUTH IS ON FUCKIN FIRE AND IM EATING ICE! ) So she brings us refills, he finishes his cold, BBQ enchiladas, and wishes he could order dessert but is in fear that it will come out wrong. So we proceed to check out, and head to the door. And nicely tips 20% still!
It is flooding outside, and I mean like pouring rain and like 4 inches on the ground! Snape wants to be a gentleman and pull the car around, but I aint no yippie bitch, so I volunteer to run out there with him, why should he get soaked and me stay dry? So we run out to his truck and we get soaked. I look like a damn wet dog.
What did we learn from this?
- I am a JINX. Theres no doubt about it in my mind.
- Anything that could go wrong, did go wrong.
- Also, do not ever go to a Chili's.
- If shit does go wrong, its best to do it with a guy who will laugh everything off with you.
- I give up on dating
Broke College Student