I'm not going to lie, I am not one of those girls who girls will be all like, "oh shes so graceful".
I took dance for 15 years, and my lovely dance teacher Ms. Shannon, would call me a range of things, honestly I was the wild one of the group who was most likely getting into the most trouble (and shaking my butt for fun), but the last thing she would ever call me would be graceful.
While on the phone with my overly-honest mother the other day, she sarcastically called me graceful as I stepped off the side walk wrong and had a truck full of guys POINTING and laughing at me. POINTING! are your fucking serious. Yall get your ass over here and what me kick all of your asses.
Me tripping and falling is an hourly/everyday occurance......
If you know me, and most of my friends know me a little too well, and would call me a clutz. If I spelt that wrong then get over it.
I'm damn good at wearing 6 inch heels and dresses, its when it comes to flats and tennis shoes that my bodily functions get all out of whack. I can't help it.
I am constantly falling/stepping the wrong way off of the sidewalks on campus and tripping. Or while walking on the I always seem to manage to find that one hidden hole in the grass and fall. Usually when I'm surrounded by a bunch of hot guys or hot guys are driving by me and they all bust out laughing.....RUDE!
Or while I'm at work, I will find that one slippery spot and down I go! with the entire restaurant laughing at me and staring at me for the rest of my shift to see if I fall again. And I'm always so good at finding the few poles at work that are just dieing to have me run into them, like really!?
And while we're on the subject of me falling, tripping, running into poles and slipping, I will also point out another one of my quirky qualities. I have no flaws, I'm quirky. I tend to get a little toungue tied, or I will zone out of a conversation when I'm in the middle of one. Yeah it sucks, but I talk to fast, talk before I think, and I'm very ADD. Ooh look a marathon of Gossip Girl is on! YAY! Wow I really need to make my toes nails into disco balls again. Did I have homework? oh well due tomorrow, do tomorrow. fuckkkkkkkkk. Wheres my Iphone?
See its a problem, the crazy berry/gray family gene that comes along with having the berry bubble butt. Hopefully my flat assed sister will not have to suffer as the rest of the women in my family do. Its a fate I cant change. Until I get a rich husband who can provide me lots of doctors.
But the main reason why I'm writing this is just to get off my busty chest the fact that I'm clumsy. When I see people fall, i run over to help them up, then I laugh with them and that my lovelies is how you will make new friends, who have the clutziness in common with you. Unless it was like a really slow-motion fall, those are so fuckin entertaining.
So now that you've read this hopefully be nice enough to not laugh at strangers who fall, or get tongue tied. Cause I can bet my sweet ass that your shit stinks, like everyone elses, and that you dont like being laughed at either.
So thats all I have to say on that subject for the moment. It just supports the many reasons as to why I hate everyone.
Shit happens. BOOM. You can get out of therapy now. Pay me instead.
Broke College Student
I took dance for 15 years, and my lovely dance teacher Ms. Shannon, would call me a range of things, honestly I was the wild one of the group who was most likely getting into the most trouble (and shaking my butt for fun), but the last thing she would ever call me would be graceful.
While on the phone with my overly-honest mother the other day, she sarcastically called me graceful as I stepped off the side walk wrong and had a truck full of guys POINTING and laughing at me. POINTING! are your fucking serious. Yall get your ass over here and what me kick all of your asses.
Me tripping and falling is an hourly/everyday occurance......
If you know me, and most of my friends know me a little too well, and would call me a clutz. If I spelt that wrong then get over it.
I'm damn good at wearing 6 inch heels and dresses, its when it comes to flats and tennis shoes that my bodily functions get all out of whack. I can't help it.
I am constantly falling/stepping the wrong way off of the sidewalks on campus and tripping. Or while walking on the I always seem to manage to find that one hidden hole in the grass and fall. Usually when I'm surrounded by a bunch of hot guys or hot guys are driving by me and they all bust out laughing.....RUDE!
Or while I'm at work, I will find that one slippery spot and down I go! with the entire restaurant laughing at me and staring at me for the rest of my shift to see if I fall again. And I'm always so good at finding the few poles at work that are just dieing to have me run into them, like really!?
And while we're on the subject of me falling, tripping, running into poles and slipping, I will also point out another one of my quirky qualities. I have no flaws, I'm quirky. I tend to get a little toungue tied, or I will zone out of a conversation when I'm in the middle of one. Yeah it sucks, but I talk to fast, talk before I think, and I'm very ADD. Ooh look a marathon of Gossip Girl is on! YAY! Wow I really need to make my toes nails into disco balls again. Did I have homework? oh well due tomorrow, do tomorrow. fuckkkkkkkkk. Wheres my Iphone?
See its a problem, the crazy berry/gray family gene that comes along with having the berry bubble butt. Hopefully my flat assed sister will not have to suffer as the rest of the women in my family do. Its a fate I cant change. Until I get a rich husband who can provide me lots of doctors.
But the main reason why I'm writing this is just to get off my busty chest the fact that I'm clumsy. When I see people fall, i run over to help them up, then I laugh with them and that my lovelies is how you will make new friends, who have the clutziness in common with you. Unless it was like a really slow-motion fall, those are so fuckin entertaining.
So now that you've read this hopefully be nice enough to not laugh at strangers who fall, or get tongue tied. Cause I can bet my sweet ass that your shit stinks, like everyone elses, and that you dont like being laughed at either.
So thats all I have to say on that subject for the moment. It just supports the many reasons as to why I hate everyone.
Shit happens. BOOM. You can get out of therapy now. Pay me instead.
Broke College Student